Insomnia … we meet again. The past several months this evil friend of mine has shown its face more than once. In fact, I’d say almost every night. As I lay awake … often times until the wee morning hours (when I can see the sun creeping into the sky) I wonder when will this ever end? When I first came to Japan my whole internal clock was out of whack. But that was expected. I had just jumped 14 hours ahead. Within the first couple weeks I had felt like I had beaten the jet lag, only to have it creep up on me again a month later. And ever since then, I have been struggling with major sleep problems.
Sometimes I attribute this to lack of mental exercise. I read, I write, and do other things to try to keep my mind working and busy. But I remember when I used to come home mentally exhausted from a day at work. Granted, I didn’t exactly love my job (and don’t regret leaving it) but I do miss that aspect of it. Sometimes I attribute it to the fact that I am 14 hours ahead of where I used to live. So when I am going to sleep, all my family and friends are busy starting their day. And I want to know what they’re up to! I don’t want to have to wait 8 hours to find out. And sometimes I attribute this to making endless to-do lists in my head. Things I have to do, things I want to do, things I need to remember. I write them down (a piece of advice I received) but when I’m laying there, not feeling an ounce of tiredness, I might (I think) as well get started.
I feel like I’ve been doing everything I can to fight this. I have tried hot baths before bed to relax. I have tried drinking a hot cup of tea (Celestial Sleepy Time tea I might add) and even hot water with lemon. I’ve laid in bed trying to relax my body starting with my toes, like so many people suggest. I’ve tried yoga poses. I’ve tried counting. I’m not one to medicate but I even tried Ambien. I don’t take pain relievers to fight headaches (or any other type of pain). I’ve maybe only have taken cough/cold medicine once or twice that I can remember. But seeing there was no other end to my frustration I gave it a shot. After a very weird and scary experience while trying to stay awake to finish a book (another method to bring on sleepiness), I probably won’t be taking them again. I’d rather do without the hallucinations and grogginess the next day. So here I am. With one month left. Wondering, when I do return home, if my friend going to come with me. I really hope not.
Did I mention it’s 2am? Andrew is snoring. And I’m, you guessed it, wide awake.